Teacher's day

It's that time of the year again, where the Teacher's Day is celebrated. But then, I didn't go to school today because I slept late last night. I woke up this morning, looked at my phone and then I was like "I slept late last night and now I'm awake this early in the morning. I deserve to sleep again!" That's pretty much explains why I didn't go to school today. Anyway, since it's the Teacher's Day, I thought like why not I blog about this? Plus, I have my very own sister who's a teacher as well. I never thought I would end up having a sister who's a teacher. To be honest, it's a great experience. It's fun that I get to read her students essays since she brought them back during the school holidays to be marked. 

I remember asking her why did she ask her students to write an essay on a piece of paper? I mean like, you know, for sure after she gives the essays back to her students after done with the marking and stuff then they will throw it away. At least, I don't trust myself writing something on a piece of paper because I know that I will end up losing that one piece of paper. Or maybe I should say, throwing. Then, I was like "You need to ask your students to write the essay in their exercise books." Do you know what did she say? "I have to mark about 70 essays. And that's equal to 70 pieces of paper. If I ask them to do it in their book, I have to bring like 70 books home. For sure 70 pieces of paper is way way better than 70 books. It's like bringing a book instead of 70 books. See, I'm such a brilliant teacher." You see, this teacher is so malas.

Happy Teacher's Day Miss Fatiha!! ❤

Thoughts during these midterms

So, I've been feeling a lot better now but not fully recovered yet. I mean, you know, my voice still sounds weird and almost every single person I talked to for these past few days recognized it. I hate hearing my own voice. Anyway, I'm gonna blog about my thoughts during these midterms. Well, I honestly think that I may fail my science subjects for this midterms. I have never sat in an exam where I honestly had no idea how to answer half of the paper until now. All I did during my Biology paper was just sitting there clueless, looking outside as if there's gonna be Hedwig (Harry Potter's owl) flying towards me while bringing the scheme for the Biology paper. There was a Biology question where the question is based on the diagram. And the question provided 10 marks if I'm not mistaken. The thing is, I just had no idea at all what the diagram was. I was like "Did we even learn this? What chapter is this even in? Or did my textbook come without this chapter?! Is it possible for me to sue the manufactures..." 

I even thought about my future during these midterms. Well, I did this every single time I couldn't manage to answer the questions to be honest. I was like, "Why did I take the science stream in the first place? You know what guys, just forget it. I should just open a burger shop."

Please buy my burgers.

Sick

I'm supposed to be in school right now but here I am, typing and trying not to bother with my stuffy nose and headache. Not that I'm complaining but my eyeballs literally feel warm. I know it sounds weird but it really feels like that right now. Not to mention but I have Agama papers tomorrow and obviously, I haven't studied anything. Not even a bit. So, I'm not sure whether I'm going to school or not tomorrow. But then, is it possible for me to retake the papers if I didn't sit for them tomorrow? I don't think that I'll be able to answer any of the questions asked in this condition. Plus, how do you expect me to answer them when I haven't done any revisions yet?

Yesterday, my head was pounding and it was so painful. Plus, my nose was stuffed up and I couldn't breathe. I felt all warm and even my eyeballs felt so. I even cried which I knew wasn't helping the situation at all but it just hurts so bad. I can't even remember the last time I cried like that. Mum knows me too well that I'm not that kind of person who cries easily. She knows that I will only cry because of something I can't bear with. So, that's pretty much explains why she had being all worried last night since I cried as if my cat just got stolen. Well, I bet if my cat got stolen then I will cry as hard as I cried last night. I swear she did everything she could, calmed me down, gave me the head massage, wrapped my head with the wet towel, well you name it. Since the headache was getting harder that I thought it would be and I couldn't breathe, not even a bit, mum persuaded me to go to the hospital. Then I was like, one word, no. I mean like you gotta be kidding me, going to the hospital means that there will be needles poked into my hand or whatever you call it. So, thanks but no thanks. 

Then, she was like, "Okay whatever, we'll go to the clinic." You know what guys, when I was about to go inside my room to change my clothes, I couldn't stand up. I was like "Somebody help me! My world is upside down!" Trust me, I'm not kidding. My mum even sure that my head hurts so bad right after she saw me wearing the tudung with awning because she knows that never in my life will I wear that kind of tudung. I didn't have any energy to wear a shawl so I thought like, the tudung with awning would do. (In case you don't know what is meant by the tudung with awning, it's like the instant tudung where you can just wear it like that, no need to wear brooch or anything.) The funny thing is, when I was about to wear my flip flops, my mum was like "Honey, you're not gonna wear that with that skirt. Wait, I'll find your flat shoes." Okay mum, okay. 

When we reached the clinic, almost all of the sick people were babies and they were not crying. Everyone was looking at me because I was the only one (big baby) who cried. So tak tahu malu! Not long after that, my name was called to see doctor, so I came inside. The doctor was like "Are you sick?" I swear I was about to say "If not then I wouldn't be here right now." Not only that, he even asked me whether I had a fever or not. I was about to say, "How do you expect me to know? I mean, come on. You're are the doctor. You should have checked whether I demam or not. Gila." I swear that he only checked me for like less than 5 minutes. If like this la, I can also open my own clinic and check orang tak sampai 5 minit. Then I was being as polite as I possibly could and asked him for mc.

Me/The doctor

"I need mc for this Sunday in case if I couldn't go to school. I mean, I have exam and maybe with the mc then I can retake the papers."

"No. I can only give you the mc for yesterday (Thursday) and today (Friday)."

"No. I need mc for this Sunday. Just in case, you know."

"No. If you want it then you need to come here again this Sunday and I will decide whether I should give you the mc or not."

"No."

I swear, I will never go to this clinic after this. 

Siblings

Instead of studying, here I am typing on the chair which I can't remember the last time I sat here. No, I'm not gonna blog about politics and stuff but please bear in mind that just because I don't talk about it doesn't mean I don't care or I don't have an opinion about it. Anyway, my mum was hospitalized a few days back and just got discharged like three days ago. Well, that was the third time she was hospitalized for this month to be exact. After doing the ERCP which is a technique where the physicians can see the inside of the stomach, they assumed that she's all good now. I am forever grateful. Back then when my mum was hospitalized, there was this woman aged like 70 or something who cried every single time my siblings visited my mum. It was so heart-wrenching to know that she cried because none of his sons and daughters visited her. I mean, how could they?

Anyway, since my mum is not 100 percent in the pink of health yet, my sisters decided to cook. I, myself don't trust my sisters at first but then when I tasted their cooking, it was not that bad after all. First impressions are not always right they said. So, I have tasted three dishes cooked by my sisters which is fried chicken, prawn with bitter bean and tom yam. The funny thing is, one of my sisters kept going to the kitchen to see how much her tom yam left. I mean like every time I went to the kitchen then I saw her standing in front of her tom yam which was placed on the table. By looking at her face, I could tell that she was impressed. I could see it coming out of her head in a thought bubble, "I did it. Everyone loves my tom yam."

My sister/Me
"How does my fried chicken taste like?"
"I don't know rasa kunyit." (I was about to say "Crazy sedap. Like sedap gila" at first which is the truth but then I know her too well that she'll brag about it later, so I tipu sunat instead)
"Of course la you need to put kunyit into the fried chicken."
"But not too much"
Then my other sister interrupted our conversation.

"She's the one who ate the most. Siap tambah."

My sister's signature dish.

Lost

I miss writing. I miss reading. I miss myself. There you go. I've been saying how much I miss writing but talk is cheap girl. I have been neglecting my blog for way too long. I sometimes wish I could write the way I used to. Words seemed to flow better back then than how it is today. As a matter of fact, I don't even know if I have it in me to write the way I used to. It scares me to be honest, because every time I try to write something, I stop half way and end up backspacing the whole thing. I seek for perfection. These two, writing and reading, were the things that kept me calm whenever things just not right. I don't know. I can't even. I don't know. So much has happened in just a little amount of time. No lie, life has been nothing but amazing, like I honestly can't remember the last time I was truly depressed. But somehow, something, just feels different. Something changed in me.

To be honest, I actually wrote the first paragraph of this post like two weeks ago? I don't know. I felt like the weight of a 35 ton lorry was about to crash on me a few weeks back. Alhamdulillah, everything is great now other than the fact that I have only about 2 weeks (If I'm not mistaken) to prepare for my midterms. I feel truly, content with my life. Today, I'm enjoying my own company. I don't feel the need to talk to anyone, today it feels good to be on my own. On a brighter note, I have started reading again. I read a really good book yesterday and I'm captivated with an interesting piece of writing in that book. It says "If I've learned one thing from all that's happened to me, it's that there is no such thing as the biggest mistake of your existence. There's no such this as ruining your life. Life's pretty resilient thing, it turns out."

Expect more blog posts ;) x